You can’t out-train Old Age
I had one goal for the dog training seminar I attended last week: to reconnect with my dog, Rumour.
Rumour has taken up the mantle of being my working partner, and my last dog left before my marriage where we became a “blended family,” joining my husband’s dogs with my own.
And boy, we certainly achieved that goal. I came to re-discover my appreciation for how truly remarkable of a dog she is on that trip. Every second of our adventure, she was just happy to be there. Driving across the country, making a new Malinois friend, hanging out at the seminar with 20+ new dogs, learning new skills and tricks, going for an off leash hike with other dogs - if dogs could smile, she certainly had one the entire time.
And I had this realization when sitting down for lunch by the second day - our time is limited. Too limited.
You see, it’s been 3 months and 7 days since the worst heartbreak I’ve ever experienced. At 14 years old, my border collie, Emma, had dementia and arthritis and pain and…her mental and physical sharpness that made her, her, were gone.
In the comfort of our living room on a beautiful sunny day, with the windows open, we let her go to sleep. It was March 12th.
For those of you who don’t know Emma’s story, she’s the reason I started The Composed Canine. Like many of you, I found myself with a dog who I loved with all of my heart, but she was a struggle.
To this day, she’s still one of the worst reactivity cases I’ve ever seen. She bit…a lot of people. She also bit a lot of dogs. I didn’t understand why, and I thought if I just loved her enough, if I just exercised her enough, she wouldn’t have to have such Big Feelings about everything.
I tried the University of Google, with a minor in YouTube. You may be surprised to know that that did not, in fact, make me a subject matter expert on dog behavior 🤣
When I graduated college in 2015 and got my first corporate job, the first thing I did was hire a dog trainer.
My life changed irrevocably from that experience.
I started to go to seminars and workshops on dog behavior and training, made friends with other dog trainers, and began to obsessively learn everything I could about dog etymology, behavior modification, obedience, pack dynamics, group socials, and play, just to name a few.
I learned why my dog would growl and lunge and bark at every dog and person she saw.
And, after years of experiencing it, I learned how to help her.
I understood her. I learned to advocate for her. I learned to coach her and help her. I learned how to love her in a way that benefited her, not just me.
It was empowering! And I wanted to empower other people to do the same!
So, after a time, I opened The Composed Canine and I started helping other people who also loved their dogs, but were experiencing struggles with them as well.
It’s empowering to help dogs, and to help people help their dogs. I’m incredibly proud of the work I’ve done since I’ve joined the ranks of this industry.
But it doesn’t change the inevitable. We can train. We can modify behavior. But we can’t out-train old age. And damnit if that isn’t heartbreaking all over again.
Iowa was a success. I’m so proud of Rumour, and I absolutely feel more connected to her than before our trip. And I’m actively treasuring every moment with her (and Blue and Daisy, my other dogs who joined our family when I met my husband).
The thing about dog training is that it truly brings you closer to your dog so you can live your best days together. But for every dog we fall in love with, it’s so valuable that we cherish our time together because even a long life isn’t enough. 14 years wasn’t enough.